Chapter Two: In My Place
I suppose I've let a bit of time pass between chapters, but this might take a while for me to have a complete story, so you'll just have to sit back, relax, and enjoy the ride. A side note, I'm working on a title for my story, I hope to have one up soon for you to view.
In My Place
Moving on with the song of a life, I've moved to chapter two, which enters my actual life. I've come into the world with much hope and joy, feeling the newness of life and refreshment of the world.
And that's where it stops. The good feelings gone, reality starts to kick in, and I see and learn what we do with this mess we've made of life. My second song comes from a personal favourite band of mine, Coldplay, who seem to have a knack for taking the words right out of my mouth. This next song conveys exactly what I've wanted to say.
In my place, In my place
Were lines that I couldn't change
I was lost, oh yeah
I was lost, I was lost
Crossed lines I shouldn't have crossed
I was lost, oh yeah
In my place were lines that I couldn't change. Hmm. Isn't it true that it seems that I landed (or rather fallen rather painfully) in this world, in a country not of my own choosing, with a family I had no say over, and the circumstances that are beyond my reach. Lines had been set that I couldn't move outside of, I could only move forward. And when I moved forward, often times I made a wrong step and fell. I tried to step outside the bounds set for me, and I was knocked down into the dust, face flat, dazed and wondering why. I fell into this mortal, fallen hole of a world, and it left me dazed and confused.
Yeah, how long must you
Wait for it
Yeah, how long must you
Pay for it
Yeah, how long must you
Wait for it
The beauty that I once beheld at the beginning of my life had faded away, and I had fallen to the ground, hurt, bruised, and with no one to help me stand up. How long do I have to stay in this place, to wait for something to change, for someone to pick us up? Has someone out there come to my rescue? Are they trying to pay my ransom? Have they waited long to see me come to them? I didn't have a clue, I just knew I was cold, and couldn't save myself, I didn't hold much hope for the future.
I was scared, I was scared
Tired and underprepared
But I wait for it
And if you go, if you go
And leave me down here on my own
Then I'll wait for you
I fell to this place, broken and wounded. I was scared, I didn't know what to do, I had no direction. I only hoped that the faint voice I could hear in the distance would call out to me. It was that faint, still, small voice that caught my attention in the beginning, and it would draw me closer and closer to the answer. I feared abandoment, and I knew nothing else to do but to wait for a rescue.
Singing please, please, please
Come back and sing to me
To me, me
Come on and sing it out,
Now, now
Come on and sing it out,
To me, me
Come back and sing
I love the yearning in this last little bit, it is so true, I begged that love I once felt to come back, I cried out, I wanted to hear that voice again, to bring me back into his arms of love, where I could find peace and safety from danger. I pleaded with the voice to call out to me through the darkness. At this point, I didn't truly know who I was straining to find, but I knew that whoever it was, it was more worth finding than anything in this world. And so I kept searching and calling out, hoping that one day there would be an answer, dying to find a foothold, or a place I could hold onto, pleading for someone to come. Slowly I was slipping from the tedious place I was on this cliff, and would have perished over the edge quickly. I begged for mercy.
And thank God it came.
In My Place
Moving on with the song of a life, I've moved to chapter two, which enters my actual life. I've come into the world with much hope and joy, feeling the newness of life and refreshment of the world.
And that's where it stops. The good feelings gone, reality starts to kick in, and I see and learn what we do with this mess we've made of life. My second song comes from a personal favourite band of mine, Coldplay, who seem to have a knack for taking the words right out of my mouth. This next song conveys exactly what I've wanted to say.
In my place, In my place
Were lines that I couldn't change
I was lost, oh yeah
I was lost, I was lost
Crossed lines I shouldn't have crossed
I was lost, oh yeah
In my place were lines that I couldn't change. Hmm. Isn't it true that it seems that I landed (or rather fallen rather painfully) in this world, in a country not of my own choosing, with a family I had no say over, and the circumstances that are beyond my reach. Lines had been set that I couldn't move outside of, I could only move forward. And when I moved forward, often times I made a wrong step and fell. I tried to step outside the bounds set for me, and I was knocked down into the dust, face flat, dazed and wondering why. I fell into this mortal, fallen hole of a world, and it left me dazed and confused.
Yeah, how long must you
Wait for it
Yeah, how long must you
Pay for it
Yeah, how long must you
Wait for it
The beauty that I once beheld at the beginning of my life had faded away, and I had fallen to the ground, hurt, bruised, and with no one to help me stand up. How long do I have to stay in this place, to wait for something to change, for someone to pick us up? Has someone out there come to my rescue? Are they trying to pay my ransom? Have they waited long to see me come to them? I didn't have a clue, I just knew I was cold, and couldn't save myself, I didn't hold much hope for the future.
I was scared, I was scared
Tired and underprepared
But I wait for it
And if you go, if you go
And leave me down here on my own
Then I'll wait for you
I fell to this place, broken and wounded. I was scared, I didn't know what to do, I had no direction. I only hoped that the faint voice I could hear in the distance would call out to me. It was that faint, still, small voice that caught my attention in the beginning, and it would draw me closer and closer to the answer. I feared abandoment, and I knew nothing else to do but to wait for a rescue.
Singing please, please, please
Come back and sing to me
To me, me
Come on and sing it out,
Now, now
Come on and sing it out,
To me, me
Come back and sing
I love the yearning in this last little bit, it is so true, I begged that love I once felt to come back, I cried out, I wanted to hear that voice again, to bring me back into his arms of love, where I could find peace and safety from danger. I pleaded with the voice to call out to me through the darkness. At this point, I didn't truly know who I was straining to find, but I knew that whoever it was, it was more worth finding than anything in this world. And so I kept searching and calling out, hoping that one day there would be an answer, dying to find a foothold, or a place I could hold onto, pleading for someone to come. Slowly I was slipping from the tedious place I was on this cliff, and would have perished over the edge quickly. I begged for mercy.
And thank God it came.
posted by Eucharisto at 9:06 PM
4 Comments:
Hi, this is the Queen's Mum. This has nothing to do with your post and since we only met briefly once, you may not want to respond and I understand. I wanted to ask about something I prayed for. How did the play back in April go? Charlie's Aunt? I hope it went well. I understand we will get to see you again in a few days! God bless.
Yeah! Looking forward to seeing you all soon. In reference to the 'Charlie's Aunt', your prayers might have worked, yet in an opposite way. As we got into the production, we saw we were not going to be able to be faithful for the time each week that was needed of us, and for some reason, when we talked with the director, she apologised, and said she had miscast, and everything worked out well enough. Instead of doing that, I've spent the time recording my album, which I'll bring a copy or two when I visit. It's actually worked out for the best, and thanks for your prayers. It's a nice feeling to know I'm being covered in prayer.
Penny Lane, I guess it's a good thing that all your jobs only equal one work week!
This post is so powerful...the vast state of my demise without Christ.. wow what a reminder. I still am amazed that He did call out to me. I can remember the first time I heard that faint voice calling me. Now, years later it is so precious to me. I'll never forget the first time I learned what 'grace' was. I think I was about 27 or 28.
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